On waiters

And now dear friends a word on the perils of travelling alone in Paris. When in a cafe one has finished one’s coffee and then heads to the lavatory, one naturally takes one’s valuables with one. This however signifies ineluctably to a French waiter – a breed renowned through the world for their kindness and understanding – that one is planning to scarper without paying. The said waiter therefore pursues the hapless customer into the toilets to confront him while he is still relieving himself. It’s quite annoying really.

On transport

And now dear Londoners did you think that it was only on our beloved underground that you can walk so far from the entrance to the platform that you feel that you have walked the entire distance to your destination? Not so – let me introduce you to Chatelet (you will have to imagine the circumflex accent) – its labyrinthine tunnels will have you filled with the warm glow of nostalgia for Bank-Monument. So discombobulated was your humble servant that he leapt on the train going in the wrong direction and has wasted a perfectly good ticket trying to repair the damage. Still, onwards and upwards. Back to the hotel for a preprandial rest.

On speaking French

Oh and another thing, dear friends. Several times in the last 24 hours I have been complimented on my French accent. Strangely, analogous comments on my grammar or vocabulary have not been forthcoming. ‪#‎damningwithfaintpraise‬

On intercommunion

The order of service booklet for Holy Week at Notre Dame says “if you do not share our faith in the living presence of Christ in the Eucharistic bread, we ask you not to join your neighbours at communion time”. Do they really mean that communion is open to all who believe in the real presence? If they mean it is restricted to Roman and Eastern Catholics only (as I would have imagined) why do they not say so?